Dept. Of Much Needed Humor — Sen. Warren’s Display of Backbone Threatens Career as Democrat

By Andy Borowitz
The New Yorker (12/16/14)

What some insiders are calling a “rash display of backbone” last week could endanger Senator Elizabeth Warren’s career as a Democrat, leading party operatives say.

Harland Dorrinson, a strategist who has guided the campaigns of dozens of Democratic candidates, said that the Massachusetts legislator’s “recklessly truthful” tirade about banks left him “smacking my head.”

“She stood up for what she believed in and didn’t try to water it down,” he said. “That is a serious violation of the Democratic playbook.”

“Whenever you’re talking about banks or Wall Street, it’s crucial that a Democrat sound as indistinguishable from a Republican as possible,” he said. “Apparently, Elizabeth Warren didn’t get the memo.”

The strategist said that Warren could possibly salvage her career as a Democrat if her advisers dissuade her from further outbursts of integrity in the future.

“There’s still hope for her,” he said. “But someone needs to sit her down and say, ‘We are the party of Dukakis, the party of Mondale. This is not how we roll.’ ”

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