Puddle: Deep Thoughts From the NRA’s New Style Mag For Millenials

By Mike Spies
Vocativ (7/24/14)

Earlier this year, the National Rifle Association launched a slick new media venture geared toward millenials called NRA Freestyle. The collection of web-based series was about as appealing to young folk as MTV under the direction of George Will.

Simultaneously, the NRA introduced a new lifestyle publication called NRA Sharp—a kind of GQ meets BuzzFeed for stylish gun owners. Its website is filled with listicles, intensely photoshopped images of gun-toting women and strange riffs about hypothetical characters like “The Spiritual Hunter.” (Your guess is as good as ours.)

What’s most striking about the publication, however, is the depth of its writing. The site is deep, like Jack Handy deep. Here’s a sample of Sharp’s words of wisdom:

“Look around you and soak up the greatness of being a young, proud gun owner.”

“Here we celebrate the simpler materials drawn from the earth, without which we could not enjoy the beauty of guns.”

“There are plenty of clever ways to hide your guns: One traditional favorite is to hollow out the interior of a book in your library.”

“If you wear Chacos to a wedding, you wear Chacos on a hunt.”

“No one who craves the feeling of a sturdy gun in their hands is capable of being satisfied with the mundane.”

“Nothing can ruin a clean shot like a dirty gun.”

“It’s a battle as old as Adam and Eve: You love the smell of spent brass, sighting in your 700, bound-and-cover drills and debating carry calibers—but your girlfriend doesn’t.”

“A destination shooting adventure is a chance to create new memories.”

“Surround yourself with your fellow armed and proud friends, and make a day of it. Or a night of it. Better yet, make a life of it.”

“She even speaks her mind in those rare quiet times, wearing workout tights to the coffee shop after an active day at the range.”

“We’re in America, where we have the freedom to own a firearm and celebrate that right with our countrymen. Nothing else needs to matter right now. Just this.”

Link to Story and Bizarre NRA ‘Guns n. Chicks, Photos

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